How To End A Relationship

There are ways to exit with grace out of a relationship and of course, there are ways to do it like a total asshole. Whichever that you are, either the dumper or the dumpee, it will create some sort of tension and a considerable stress to both parties. Look at how Rachel Marsden reacted when the Wikipedia founder, Jimmy Wales  rebutted her claim and issued a statement that they only met once and only had a brief relationship. I really dont know the details to their liasons but thats the price you have to pay when you are famous. Everyone wants to know and will wag about your sexual sexcapes or check your thrash.

Preserving one’s dignity when ending a relationship is hard to do when you do realise there was a time when there were true feelings involved between both of you. I have seen friends who were dumped in the most unceremonious ways that I sometimes think everybody should be a monk and never get involve in any relationships. Whatsoever. Among few top favourites on how to be a total asshole when you are the dumper are by using the following techniques:

Texting. Yeah, so you dont grow the pair yet to tell your partner that you are dumping her? “Sori bt i x thnk our rlthip s wking, so hv dcided we shd nt c echoter anymre. gudbye n tke cre.” How’s that?

Email. Why does email seems to be the easiest channel to break off from a relationship when all these time you both have spent like, thousands of dollars on phone bills talking about everything under the stars right down to the colours of curry stains on your shirt.

A Dear John/Jill letter. “Dear (insert name here), sorry but I dont think our relationship is working, so I have decided we should not see each other anymore”. See the recurring theme here?

Advertise it . Yeah, a totally classy move. Myspace bulletin, Friendster shoutouts, Facebook wall- all have used to a certain creative extend by dumpers to dump the partner, and letting their ten gadzillion friends know.

IM. When before this you both have spent like, thousands on the phone bills talking to each other. See another recurring theme??

And finally, the classiest of all dumping method..

By just disappearing from the other party’s life. Not picking and returning phone calls, emails, changing to new address, zip code, state, country, whatever and basically doing just that – exiting from the previous relationship.

 A recommended reading by John Gray is here. It offers some practical guide on how to move on with your life after a breakup.


5 Replies to “How To End A Relationship”

  1. Brilliant How To. Or should I have say, how not to?

    I take it the John Gray book was useful.

    One of our rugby team recently got a text (sms) message that said “consider urself dumpd” followed by a couple of expletives.
    No, not nice at all!

    Isn’t it better however, to cut the dangling rope rather than keep the pretense going?

  2. Winslie: I posted this to serve as an inspiration to those who have the thought of being a dumper. There are ways to break a relationship but not necessarily being an ass, so to speak. Sorry to hear about your rugby team member. But knowing now that you will not end up with a person who does not respect one’s feelings like that, can be a blessing.

  3. Hi Hanie,

    Very interesting article. Call me old fashioned, but what happened to a phone call
    or meeting in person for a cup of coffee.
    Anyway, seems like there are too many options
    for communications not all of which are personal.

    I have a single parent blog and would love to exchange blogroll links with you. My site is
    Please email me at
    Would love to hear from you and good luck with
    those broken discs!

    Many Thanks


  4. Hey George, thanks for dropping by! The pain at the back is still there but medication and several good dose of hot packs help.

    Phone calls, George, as you are aware, have been replaced with text messenging and IMs. I really dont mind sms-es but hate it when it is turned to be a tool for those who are chicken enough to own up to their own actions.

    Ive added you to my blogroll. 😉

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