Interview With The Cat


This is a spin-off from Interview With The Vampire, the novel written by Anne Rice and turned into a movie in 1994, directed by Neil Jordan.

This piece today is inspired by this grey tabby kitty who keeps on popping into our house almost on a daily basis. He would inspect the house from the top floor, comes down to stairs to head towards the living room, passing by my china cabinet, sniffing. Then jump on the sofa, trailing the length and walk back towards the kitchen to eat from the row of cat bowls. But, not before sniffing around the dining hall where some of the cat toys are.  He would sleep in one of the cages or on the kitchen counter. I managed to stroke and hug him a few days ago. His purring was so loud.

I call him Mr Andromeda Grey (The Rescued Grey).

Me: Thank you for agreeing to this interview, Mr Grey.

Mr Grey: Yrrroouuuu are most welcome.

Me: For a start, can you share with us what do you do on a daily basis?

Mr Grey: I..rrr run a busy day..looking for comfortable bench to sleep, chasing birds and bugs, inspecting the other housing resident cats, and eating. (at this point of time I saw him preening his long tail and looking ever so sleepy)

Me: I understand that you are looking for a prospective forever-home. Why?

Mr Grey: The streets are becoming more dangerous in this area. There are street dogs roaming around especially at night. I wonder what happened to their humans? At 10 years old, I have aged considerably and chasing for my food is no longer that much fun. (Mr Grey proceeded to show me his row of teeth) It is tiring enough to sleep the whole day….

Me: So, Mr Grey, what are your criteria for this new forever-home?

Mr Grey: Owhhhh prrrrrrr……I have simple criteria…..plenty of food the whole day, lots of space to roam around. I hate to be in those cages you see? Nice, big sofas to sleep on. My humans should have plenty of time to scratch my belly and play with me too. (He extended his chin, an indication to be scratched, and I obliged). Mmmmmm prrrrrrrrr yes, yes scratch…prrrr dont stop….

Me: What do you think about our home?

Mr Grey: Honestly, I have been doing inspection of your house for the past 2 weeks. I like it very much. I see that you are feeding premium kibbles to your other kids instead of those kitchen left overs.

Me: (gasped) Oh yes! Only the best for the kids! No scraps!

Mr Grey: Plenty of places for me to roam and wander too. Those space (indicating the big dining table) looks prrrrrrrretty good to sleep on.

Me: Dining table is off-limit for fur-kids in this house, Mr Grey.

Mr Grey: What about those rooms upstairs that has oh-so-nice cooling aircond?

Me: Those rooms are off-limits to fur-kids too.

Mr Grey: You have too many rules………but that’s ok. The food has been delicious! I have tasted them many times. Although….that fatty big boys of yours have been making me feel uncomfortable.

Me: Which ones?

Mr Grey: The one who looks like a taiko and the one with the over sized tummy. And that female orange tabby is soooooooo authoritative! I even had to push away that boy who always had his face tuck in the food bowl (he was, of course, referring to Zeus….)

Me: Owhhhhh the taiko looking fella is Uncle Kucing, the other fella must be Prince and the female orange tabby must be Athena….that explains the messy eating area….

Mr Grey: Yes, yes those ones.

Me: Mr Grey, you are most welcomed to stay with us but we have a standard house rule.

Mr Grey: Oh uh…let’s hear it….(he had his eyes wide by now)

Me: We need to get you to the vet for snip snip and before that to Dr Kiew for medical check up. You know, just want to make sure you are healthy and happy staying with us.

Mr Grey: Do I still get to eat those fooooddddd…?

Me: Yes, Mr Grey (and at this moment, I picked him up and hugged him, happy to have a new furkid…)

The End.

Post script: Mr Grey had been sent for his snip snip and medical check up but he  left right after his confinement. He checks in once in a while for a hug and a scratch.

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